How are you? I hope you are in the best of spirits?
So I will just get down to the reason I’m writing to you.
I’m sorry about how you feel.
Yes you are crushed at the news of zayd’s upcoming marriage.
You are feeling betrayed because it should have been you.
You are reminiscing how nice and down to earth zayd was to you.
How he went out of his way to help fufill your request.
“it’s not possible that zayd went at 10pm to look for malaria drugs for you except for the fact that he had to be in love with you? Right?”
He was the one that helped you in memorizing two juzz of the Qura’an.
He gave you a book on the importance of covering up.
How he will greet with smiles.
Rumaysa darling, I’m sorry if whatever I say next hurts you but you were simply under an illusion.
You are suffering from the “assumption syndrome.”
Ok wait tell me, Has zayd ever made any verbal expression of like let alone “marriage proposal.”
So how dare he be nice to you right?
Do you know that you are not his only student?
How come you are the only one in class that thinks he was in love with you?
See dear, there is something called DTR- “Define the relationship”
You can’t sit down with “ASSUMPTION”
In the first place, you had no business forming any relationship that didn’t have a clear cut destination from the beginning.
If someone is getting too close for your comfort, pull out the DTR card .
I know his niceness tickled your senses and melted your heart.
Yeah he is cute and charming but NO he didn’t PROPOSE.
Which brings me to the matter of intention.
I hope you learnt the qura’an with the best of intentions and not because brother zayd is the teacher?
I hope you love your hijab for the right reasons?
Because if your WHY for doing these actions are not strong, then your going might get tough.
It’s weird you have never seen him with sister labeebah but yet she is the one he chose right?
There is something about a gift you have not unwrapped….there is the burning curiosity.
Having all these relationship without a DTR feels like a free snacks while waiting for the real meal.
Yes it’s hard to move on because of how love struck you are.
But my dear, we grow from pain. We learn from hurt.
Now you are going to guard your heart with a strong viciousness.
Nobody ain’t sneaking in and catch you unawares.
NO to nice men with no agenda
NO to relationships with no destination.
YES to that sheik charming that has been written to blow your mind.
Don’t worry he is going to love you without mind games.
Till then, stay STRICT.
From a retiring ICE QUEEN.
(c) Hamdalah Li